Mid-30s and mother of nine children. For Kim, it’s the most natural thing in the world. She is proud of her family, but regularly gets negative comments. The outside world does not seem to accept that five of her nine children have been diagnosed with autism: “People ask me why I kept having children.”
With an autistic husband and five autistic children at home, she is an experience expert. She has previously shared online about life in her large family, but there was a lot of gossip about this. “I want to show that sometimes it’s hard, but most of the time it’s wonderful and even fun to have special children, but the outside world is relentless.” To protect her children from this, she will tell her story anonymously on this last day of Autism Week.
Taking care of others is in her blood. After graduation, Kim will work in the elderly and disabled care. As a 22-year-old, she becomes a single mother of twin girls who do not develop according to the book: “They came too late to talk and go, but the most striking thing was that they did not play. When I washed the clothes, they put the clothespins in a long row. ” She loves her babies dearly, but finds it difficult to comfort them; they fight their way out of her arms and will not be touched. Kim recognizes her autistic brother’s behavior, and her feeling is correct: the twins have autism.
How do you recognize autism in your child? You can read more about it at Now’s Parents.
,, I wanted to do everything for them, but I had to learn not to be on top of it. I completely discovered myself back then and finally gained the confidence that I was doing it the right way. “She gets a new love, a man who enjoys the structural life that Kim offers her family. She falls in love with his calm, unaware that he also has autism.Jokingly, she says she is attracted to it: The couple has been together for ten years now and no fewer than seven children are richer.The twins are 12, the youngest is seven months old.
There is not a single type of autism
“In total, five of our nine children have been diagnosed with autism. One child prefers not to look at anyone, and the other child talks to everyone he meets; there is no one type of autism, and it manifests itself differently in everyone. “Because the outside world is not suitable for her children, she does everything she can to make it suitable at home:” Two sons have room time: they leave school to their room to relax.In the evening, two daughters eat not at the table, but in their own room, without forced conversations and without being overstimulated by brothers and sisters.We do not celebrate birthdays with the family, but with our family so the children can draw their own plan. At the top it says that everyone can be themselves. “
Kim wished there was less to judge. On the street and in the shops, she is sometimes looked down upon when her children do not make eye contact, say thank you for a slice of sausage or can not stand in a long queue at the checkout. “Some people think they are naughty, but children with autism live for themselves. They have their own needs and they do not really understand the needs of others. They can not be social with the neighbor from the corner, but is it bad? Sometimes I want to wear a yellow vest with the text: ‘I have autism, do not talk to me, let me be’, so they can be themselves completely outside the home. “
They are all walk-on walks. If you take a closer look at them, you will see how much we can learn from these people
The beautiful sides
The children go to special education and go to different schools. Kim has a daily job to ensure her children receive appropriate care. She is a mother but also the leader of her family. She does it with love and by not forgetting herself: ,, You help everyone through the day and then in the evening you think: where was I today? I take good care of myself after a long day with the children: then I take a nice long shower or go for a walk with the dog. ”
She would not change any of her children and has never fought against the ‘marks’. Kim thinks a diagnosis is nice to understand her children better. She especially sees the beautiful sides of her offspring: ,, My children tell facts and are straightforward. Where I myself may worry about something for weeks, they are very practical; they cry, wipe their tears and get going. They are all walk-on walks. If you take a closer look at them, you can see how much we can learn from these people. ”
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