Column 39: ‘When I said I had a boyfriend, he asked for my number’ | Sex & relationships

Since a few months, there has been a new cafe, Sal’s, in my neighborhood. On the corner of the street where my daughter’s school is. So I walk past it quite often. Usually in full mother state; jogging pants, no make-up, hair in a high tuber on the head, fit myself. Very occasionally I come straight from work, wearing my best outfit, earrings in, hair perfectly styled. At least I’m only here to pick up the little version of myself. I do not usually give much away, nor do I let in much; my closed circuit has no time or need for parental chat or other noise. Drop off, pick up and go.

Eyes in my back

But no matter how closed my system usually is, there is always a tear in the armor. I’ve already noticed that I picked up a different atmosphere every time I walked past Sal’s. In the afternoon it was teeming with hip birds and it seemed like I always felt some eyes in my back and got a whistle and the chirping (which I never understood). This week, a motorized bird even came after me.

Nice and direct

Near my house, the graft branch version of myself was overtaken by a man on a scooter who suddenly stopped next to me. A handsome guy, but a bit of an ass. “May I ask you a question?” he chirped. “Tell me,” I said slightly annoyed, for I was not in the best mood that day and had no time for any nonsense. But he surprised me with his “Do you have a husband?”. Wow, that was very direct. Do I have a husband? I was amazed for a moment. “Yes, I have a boyfriend,” I said, assuming he would turn around immediately. You can whistle, but stay out of my comfort zone. But his paw was still in the door …

Can I have your number?

“I always see you go to Sal with your daughter. You are such a beautiful woman. But you have a friend. Why do I always see you alone? ” Uhhh so, I always walk alone through the neighborhood. He had a point there. “My boyfriend lives in Rotterdam”, I lied. Still, the scooterboy had not been brushed off. “So you have a friend, not a man …” he continued. “We’ve just been dating for half a year,” I found out on the spot. As if it were a street interview. His eyes began to twinkle; the man saw opportunities. “Okay okay, but can I have your number?” he forced. My mouth opened in surprise. I had to deal with a brutal persistence. I’ve been through a lot, but I’ve never in my life been so out of the blue, straight out of the blue, ‘flown out on’ the street. “Then why should I give you my number? Isn’t that disrespectful to my friend?” Defending my imaginary boyfriend against a stranger couldn’t get any crazier.

fictional friend

However, he was far from giving up: “But um, it’s almost summer and everything breaks down in the summer, right? So all I can do is wait for you to look up. “I laughed at his answer. I did not add that it could wait until it weighed an ounce.” Otherwise, will I give you my number? ” was his last egg. “Would like my friend. So what do I do with your number? I’m completely in love huh! ” He did not need to know that friend was fictional. It was about relational norms and values, and occupied nests are forbidden. Of course I should have moved on a long time ago, but my throat was not empty yet …

wounded little bird

I asked him if he had ever been in love. (Where did it come from …?) “Really in love? Only once. I do not fall in love so easily anymore, “was his honest answer. I suddenly felt sorry for him. He came so smoothly towards me, had such a smooth talk that he probably tried a couple of times a week on different women, but downstairs there was just another wounded bird with a small heart. Time to end: “Go and enjoy your summer. You’ll probably meet a sweet lady and you will see me again on the corner with my daughter (when I walk past unadorned in my clothes like a sparrow), naive, undisturbed, busy with my own business with a nice noncha attitude. Key ingredients apparently to impress. No model look can compete with it. He put on his helmet. “Okay see you!” and drove off on a scooter. My mood suddenly rose a bit. I still had no friend, and the blue bottle had flown, but I went whistling to my nest.

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