Five out of six children are on vacation and I feel discomfort in my 50-year-old gut | Family

columnRoel Abraham is 50 years old, but does not want to know, has six children and only one wife. Drives a Trabant, wanders through life and shares his experiences as the father of a large family here.

The Empty Nest Syndrome. Why English terms must always be used is a mystery to me. As for me, we take an example from our former countrymen, the Flemings, who at least think of a Dutch expression or phrase auf der Stelle, if it does not exist at all. Borrowed words are then ’40-’45. But hey, the empty nest syndrome is also allowed! I always kind of laughed at that, that whimper.

Children are going to live on their own one day, and as a supposed father you have at least 18 years to prepare for that, so spare me your pathetic whining when your offspring have finally managed to find a home of their own. Children grow up, live for themselves, reproduce or not, and then you die. Done. Just something to be happy about it seems to me, and to be happy because they have found a home! Something that usually not even a single mother with triplets and in a hurry can do.


Fathers have had nothing to crumble in the milk of universal emotion for ages because we are hard, unfeeling rocks

No understanding here for old bears who watch their birds fly out and then sulk in misery, never cook again because it’s uncomfortable alone, and after three months maggots are found instead of their children. So I was also very happy that five of my relatives went this week with their youth association, to a village very far away. How I would enjoy the peace. No more “what are we eating?” all day long. or “is there any juice left?” No irritations, because I have to constantly encourage them to carry out their tasks, yes, I would do that myself now, at least it happened and also quickly and professionally.

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Fortunately, I still had my lovely little child, but a child is not a child, as the Egyptians have already taught us

After all, nobody can empty the bins better than me. Or clean the toilet. Finally, I could read a book undisturbed and sleep well without being annoyed by the sounds of the night. Who takes a bath in the middle of the night? The first day I walked around with an uneasy feeling in my 50-year-old stomach. Would they be okay? Five children gone. Only one left. The emptiness, the terrible silence. When will they come back? Oh yes, it takes a whole week. Upstairs I heard a door slam. Let me do laundry, even if there is almost nothing. Why is that door slamming? He doesn’t usually do that, does he? The eldest was usually on the phone late into the night on his computer, and now it was eerily quiet. The anxiety! Wringing my hands, I walked through our townhouse. Fortunately, I still had my lovely little child, but a child is not a child as the Egyptians taught us.

Did you know that 35 percent of women suffer from Empty Nest Syndrome when their children fly? Maybe you also have the internet, which is very helpful, then you can find out, among other things, that “women can feel torn as if their hearts have been ripped out of their bodies.” Of course the men are not mentioned again, we have had nothing to crumble in the milk of common human emotion for centuries because we are hard, emotionless stones who can hardly remember the names of their children. Fortunately, they will be home in a few days. Can I start preparing the eldest daughter’s departure abroad? With its one-way trip. “The day after tomorrow we will see our people again mother! Our brothers and sisters!” The small child is also affected. The Empty Nest Syndrome. I know what it is now.

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