Esther has a relationship with the father of her best friend Tessa

Ready for a brain twister? Tessa (27) and Esther (28) are best friends. Esther recently gave birth to a son – Tessa’s half-brother. Tessa also has a small son, Esther is a step-grandmother. Esther is Tessa’s stepmother. How can it be? Esther is in a relationship with Tessa’s father…

Tessa: “I got to know Esther about five years ago when she came to work for my father Marcel in the market butcher shop. I have a clothes shop, Esther had once been to my shop, but otherwise we had never seen each other. We got off to a good start. My father is 51 and quite young at heart. He regularly goes out drinking with the staff after work and was also planning to go to a hardstyle party with a group. Esther and I both hated it, we don’t like that music. We spent the whole evening together just to have a little fun. That’s where the friendship really started, I think.
I knew my father liked Esther more than anything. I have known him longer than today, he has no secrets from me. His crush on Esther was no problem for me at all. My parents divorced when I was three months old, I gave my father a new love. I did not see the fact that he is much older than Esther as a hindrance. What I found a bit complicated is that Esther and my father are both quite flammable. They can be quite verbal with each other. It made me doubt the match. And then Esther still had a relationship.”


Esther: “Quite soon after I came to work for him, Marcel hinted that he was in love with me. I got on very well with him, but I didn’t feel any love at all. There was a strong bond of trust between us. Marcel and I both have ADHD. In my case it was diagnosed very late, only at the age of 23. I felt good talking to him about it. Marcel understood me in that area like no one else. I was looking for a way to handle it properly. He gave me advice. In terms of relationship material, he was a no-go for me. I had a friend and I also thought Marcel was very old. And the funny thing was: I didn’t think , he was too old for me, I was afraid of what others would think of such a huge age difference.
After a few years I left Marcel’s butcher shop. I had set up a new electric car business with my father and wanted to focus on that. Marcel didn’t like me leaving, but on the other hand, it was also a relief for him. His feelings for me started getting in the way more and more. Maybe it was better, he thought, that we both got on with our own lives.”

Difficult period

Tessa: “I was living with my father at the time because I had taken time out from my relationship. So I was on top of the development. Esther’s departure caused quite a few mood swings in him. Then he got mad and frustrated, then he was glad she’d left him as an employee, and then he resigned himself to the fact that nothing could ever work between them. He didn’t show his real sorrow at the situation, but it was there.
Of course I kept in touch with Esther, but in such a way that my father got as little of it as possible. It tore me apart. I had a very sweet girlfriend in Esther, and because of my father’s crush I couldn’t see her as easily as before. I also have a very good relationship with my father. I also thought it was a difficult situation for him, he hadn’t asked for this either.’
Esther: “Tessa and I didn’t want to lose each other. I click with Marcel as much as I click with Tessa. She and Marcel look a lot alike, that has something to do with it. We have the same tastes, the same interests, and we never run out of conversation. We always have something to discuss and we tell each other absolutely everything. During the period when I started my own business with my father, I broke off the relationship with my then boyfriend. I found comfort in Tessa. I also felt more and more that I missed Marcel. I bought my ex out and I was left alone in our house with a huge mortgage. To generate some extra income to still be able to do some fun stuff, I decided to work at Marcel again one day a week. I also enjoyed working in the market so much. And then I wanted to see Marcel again…”
Tessa: “My father immediately saw his chance now that he knew Esther was single. If you give him a finger, he will take your whole hand. He did everything to seduce Esther, for example by buying her flowers. He showed the best version of himself and looked like a teenager in love. A year and a half ago, his efforts paid off. Esther went on a date with him after work. I just liked it for them. If I had to have a stepmother, Esther. And quite frankly: I was also glad that I was out of the torn situation.”

Finally happy

Esther: “Marcel and I started a relationship. As a result, I have definitely lost friends from the past; people just like it. I was most afraid of my parents’ reaction to my new boyfriend. They have experienced for themselves how bad I was in my own skin during my previous relationship. They saw me happy again and they thought that was more important than any age difference.
Tessa: “I notice in everything that my father has finally found his happiness with Esther. He’s become quite moody, but he’s very stable now – much calmer than he’s ever been. I have often been asked if I am not afraid of losing my girlfriend. I wasn’t afraid for a second. I have not only gained a girlfriend, but also a family member. We still think too much in boxes. ‘My father is in a relationship with my best friend’ might sound a bit crazy. But when you see how happy they are together, it’s not surprising at all. And Esther is a grown woman, isn’t she? My mother always taught me to look at everything in a positive way. I did the same with this. Esther’s relationship with my father has only brought us closer together. My mother has now also become friends with Esther, we have really become one big family in that regard. She is happy for me that I have such a lovely person in my life with Esther.”

desire for children

Esther: “I had a desire to have children, I made that clear to Marcel from the start. It wasn’t necessary for him anymore, but he wouldn’t take my wish away from me either. Since Marcel was already 50, we didn’t want to wait too long. I was right about it too. Years ago, I heard from doctors that it might be difficult for me to get pregnant. We reasoned that if a medical procedure is necessary, we could only know as soon as possible. But before we had really thought about it, I was already pregnant. We were beyond happy!”

Tessa: “I was heavily pregnant at the time, my water broke one day after Esther told me she was pregnant. I liked it so much for her. I already knew they were going around with the plan, but I didn’t think it would work so fast.
My son Sev (eight months) is Esther’s step-grandson. When I talk to Sev about Esther, I always jokingly say ‘grandma’. Esther’s son Moos is my half-brother. I don’t see him that way. I see Moos more as Sev’s brother. I feel very strongly that he is my family and that we are all family. My mother has recently been looking after Moos. Isn’t it nice that it’s possible?”
Esther: “I hope that Moos and Sev can grow up as brothers, that they really become friends. It’s great to be a mother. Marcel has of course already experienced it all, for him the magic from the first time is gone. Where I am very careful, it is not new to him anymore. We have made clear agreements with each other; for example, I go out every night to eat. Of course Marcel is very fond of Moos, he loves him very much.”
Tessa: “We realize that it is very special how it works for us, but in everyday life we ​​hardly think about it. Esther is my best friend and Marcel is my father. We like every now and then to say something publicly and then see the reaction of others. For example, when we go out, I deliberately introduce Esther as my stepmother. That’s not a word of a lie!”
Esther: “We are currently in the middle of a renovation, and Marcel, Moos and I are temporarily living with my parents. We have a really nice time together. Because of my previous relationship, the relationship with my parents was temporarily less good. Now we are closer than ever. So you see, I have been very much held back by what others might think. It resulted in me not daring to follow my heart, something I will definitely do from now on!”

Text: Hester Zitvast

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