Yvonne never wants to be used for her money again: ‘Not seen the 9000 euros again’

“A wolf in sheep’s clothing, that’s how I describe my ex. We’ve been together for eight months. At first he was attentive. Later I started to wonder if this was part of the game he was playing to get what he wanted, namely my money. Because of him, I got into financial problems. I had to deprive myself a lot during that period. For example, I hardly drove a car to save fuel. Fortunately, I had stock in my freezer and basement and had to do minimal shopping I couldn’t go out for dinner, have a drink or go to the theatre.

I was actually supposed to take a trip through Morocco with a friend for our 25 year friendship, but that didn’t happen. His choice not to pay me back has affected not only me, but also the people around me, and I think that’s the worst of all.”

“Over eight years ago I met a man at a party. He was articulate and charming and we started dating. He told me he had been staying with a friend for a long time and was now looking for a place to live. I believe in compassion and sharing Having your own place is important for every person, from there you can build on.

I lent him money to get his life back on track. This allowed him to move into an old detached farmhouse with a loft, where he would renovate and sell retro furniture. We made clear verbal and written agreements about the loan of 9,000 euros. I trust people until proven otherwise. It is up to others how they handle it. Unfortunately, my ex showed me ingratitude and shamelessness.”

“Pretty soon after I loaned him the money and he moved into his new home, our relationship changed. The change was his. He became very jealous and kept checking where I was. Now I see, how he tried to manipulate me.

In my living room there is a china cabinet, an heirloom from my mother. When my ex had his own place, he said that closet would look better in his house. I did not understand his intention and did not answer. Later I realized he wanted an ace up his sleeve with that. He was looking for something to beat me with if I ended the relationship with him. Very calculating.”

Hepatitis B

“One morning I woke up very sick. I was yellow from head to toe. The doctor sent me to the doctor. To my great surprise I found out that I had hepatitis B. My liver was very swollen. I have never been in my life , I was so sick. Of course I confronted my friend about it, but he said with a straight face that he didn’t know anything. Then he started acting even weirder. He became verbally aggressive towards me and the situation became unbearable.”

“Once we got into an argument in the car over a little thing. When he was home he tried to scare me by standing very close to me. He shouted that he had used me and that I was shit. He also made a pulled his hand to me. To which I said, “One punch and you get ten back. I am not afraid of the devil yet and will not let anyone oppress me.”

We saw each other again after that day. He acted aloof. After that he was completely unreachable. He did not respond to calls or texts and seemed to have disappeared off the face of the earth. I decided to end it, it wasn’t going to work between us. I sent him an email explaining my decision and reminding him of our agreement that the borrowed money should be returned to me by the end of that year at the latest.”

Deadline New Year’s Eve

“I desperately needed some of that money because I knew there was a hefty five thousand euro dental bill coming up and my car needed a new three hundred euro timing belt. He was also aware of this. would come in trouble, but he didn’t care, he took brutal abuse of my kindness.

Because he never paid me back, not even a cent. On New Year’s Eve – the day of the deadline – he called me that he could not return the money because ‘he also had to live’. He casually added that he was going to celebrate New Year’s Eve with friends. It was freezing cold. That someone could be so selfish and insensitive touched me to the core of my being.”

“At the garage I played open cards that I didn’t have the money to change the timing belt and that I couldn’t do this until I got my holiday pay. The mechanic explained that I would have even higher costs if the belt broke. He offered to replace the belt right away and that I could pay the bill later. It still gives me goosebumps when I think about it.”

More cautious and less open-minded

“I feel tremendously used and misled by this narcissist. I will never experience anything like that again. Fortunately, this experience did not determine my view of man. It made me more cautious, less open-minded. I especially do not understand. that another do what I myself sometimes had to borrow money from someone. I have never failed that trust. Paying back the amount was my first priority. Vacation money and tax refunds went directly to that person. It is not obvious that someone else would do such a thing for you, so be grateful for the opportunity someone offers you.

I am definitely ready for a new relationship. Although I wouldn’t be so quick to start something with someone who doesn’t have his life on track. I will look more out of the woods and check if anyone is in balance with what he says and does. It prevents a lot of trouble.”

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